Incomprehensible Merde

Posted on Jul 08, 2008. 7 comments

Sometimes life just happens.
In this case I believe errant garden gnomes broke in and bent my faithful addi needles in the night. Because no one else in the household has any recollection of an incident involving Mommy's sock and the bending of much beloved needles.
I replaced the needles (and some tangled, worthless yarn, ahem) during a 20% off everything sale at a LYS. When I visit the store, the owner Susan gives my child toys to play with (there's a lovely children's area in the front with lots of toys), entertains her, and other wise distracts her while I shop leisurely (barely resisting the urge to run in my birthday suit through the aisles of yarn). That paints a pretty picture, doesn't it?
When I'm not running through yarn like wood nymph I'm plowing mercilessly toward having my child teach the other children of the world bad language.
Is what accidently escaped my lips when I realized our local Farmer's Market was closed for the 4th of July holiday weekend (if you haven't had a Farmer's Market shopping emergency you haven't lived). Five times is the number of verbal repeats my child did while my garden gnome Husband pulled over due to incapacitating laughter.
Apollonius Yoked Sweater
It just needs a little extra tweaking on the sleeves. I ran out of yarn but thankfully but the shop came to my rescue on that as well. The total cost will still be $14 if you take advantage of the sale prices (or if you are fortunate enough to be buying with non US Dollars. I'm looking at you Canada.) Too bad Susan can't keep my child from swearing.


  • Posted by stephaniekreich on Jul 11, 2008

    HAHAHAHAHAHAHA! (not the needles; the swearing)
    “Yes, honey that’s a very nice Truck over there!”

  • Posted by Melody on Jul 12, 2008

    Wow…I am SO GLAD I’m not the only one with a child repeating the potty words that come out of my mouth.

  • Posted by lella on Aug 02, 2008

    Evil forces did that needle in. Did you remember any creepy noises in the night? I mean besides the snoring of that garden gnome?

  • Posted by Carrie K on Jul 08, 2008

    Garden gnomes have been rampaging mercilessly lately. Can I blame them for snapping my dpn’s? In my hands?
    There’s nothing more hilarious than a tiny tot correctly using curse words in their serious way. It’s when they’re a little older and use them in the BAD WORD I’M SO COOL way that makes me want to ……well, never mind.

  • Posted by Joelle on Jul 11, 2008

    People always blame the gnomes….

  • Posted by Kim on Jul 08, 2008

    was that her first swear word? i’ll never forget my son’s first time swearing. we took him out to dinner with us (not a fancy place of course) and i caught the car door with my elbow, pain, and muttered “damnit” under my breath. or so i though.
    we sat down and when the lovely waitress came over to get out drink order, my lovely 2 year old shouted DAMNIT!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! at the top of his tiny lungs. i was mortified. luckily, the waitress, the staff, and every customer in the restaurant laughed like there was no tomorrow. if they hadn’t, i might have been forced into hari-kari with the butter knife.

  • Posted by Lyssa on Jul 08, 2008

    That nature spun sport weight is lovey stuff, isn’t it? Especially for that price, it can’t be beat and it comes in the murky earthy colors I love.
    Personally, I find nothing funnier than small children using foul language.

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