Maya went Pee Pee on the Potty and the 7 Stages of Grief by Fickleknitter

Posted on Apr 02, 2010. 8 comments

photography assistant
Maya just went pee pee on the potty for the first time. I was growing frustrated with her non-compliance and moved through each of the 7 stages of grief over her refusal to use the potty, and that was just this morning.
1. Shock
I'm patently shocked that you won't use the potty. Because all your friends are doing it! This one might come back to bite me later.
2. Denial
Potty? What potty?
3. Anger
4. Bargaining
I'll buy you a pony. And a brand new car for the pony to sit in.
5. Depression
Woe unto me, my child will not use the potty. And now neither of us can watch TV.
6. Testing
Maya if you go sit on the potty you can have that pony. Or else Mommy is going on a long trip where there's lots of yarn, drinks with little umbrellas, and for Gods sake NO PULL-UPs. In the interim I'm just going to turn on this TV so no one gets hurt.
7. Acceptance
OHMMMMMM (That's the physics version of OMMMM for the curious) My child will not pee pee on the potty. My child will not pee pee on the potty. She will wear pull-ups to graduation. And I will be judged. But at least I'll have my TV.
Lo to the parents that read this blog and are suffering the same fate. I discovered my child is motivated solely by material gain. Punishment won't motivate her to do anything she doesn't want to do, time outs, chocolates, begging, yelling, nothing. But create a treat basket full of $1 gifts and wave it in front of her face three times a day? She's motivated, highly motivated. I'm not too proud. After all that's how to be successful in the real world, by chasing carrots?
I'm currently chasing my own carrots, hand spinning yarn and writing patterns for it.
camel silk wool sparkle
Camel/Silk/Wool/Sparkle blend. Camel/Silk by Sweet Grass Wool, Wool/Sparkle by Susan's Kitchen. I know Susan personally and her batts are so fantastic that I treat myself more than any other person should know regularly. This is easy since we usually meet at Disneyland a few times a month for playdates where our daughters do cute things like hold hands and hug while the adults eat ice cream and drink iced tea like there's no acid reflux tomorrow.
new fickleknitter cowl
I'm plugging away at my collection of handspun patterns. I just finished this one, that looks even better on, Handspun Cowl #2, wool spun from The Chicks With Sticks Merino/Tencel and Hello Yarn (I forget which blend, maybe romney) wool fiber.
Arty Handspun, Nic's Fiber II
I've really fallen hard for the art hand spun movement. I spun this yarn from a batt made by a local spinner who sells her work at the Sheared Sheep in Costa Mesa. Nicholle has only been spinning since November and she has far surpassed me in ability and creativity when it comes to spinning art yarns. She is a true artist and I can't wait to see what she comes up with next. And the bitch hand dyes the softest mohair locks I've ever touched in my life.
I'm still working up my next lace design. Everything looks great on (graph) paper but there's one nagging mistake that won't go away. In the meantime I've started to appreciate the beauty that comes off of other people's knitting needles. As a designer there's no greater compliment than when someone knits my pattern and creates something lovelier than my original vision for the piece.
photo credit: Natstitch's Wen's Wedding Shawl
When I was working in the corporate world I did a lot of programming and I was always amazed when something that I wrote worked, even after years of practice. Knitting design is sort of similar in that regard. For example Natstitch's version of Wen's Wedding Shawl is so beautiful it leaves me wondering, wow did I really design that?
Photo Credit: Chayalaura's Versacowl
And I really love Chayalaura's Versacowl. It's such a lovely, saturated color, and what a good idea to use a shawl pin. Thank you ladies, for inspiring me.
I'm off to watch some celebratory TV right after I change Maya's poopy pull-up. Maya: 2, Mama: 1. Happy Good Friday!


  • Posted by Mildawg on Apr 03, 2010

    Hahahah you had me laughing! :)
    I love the yarns and the knitting! Keep em coming!

  • Posted by Lise on Apr 05, 2010

    HAR! Thanks, you made my day. My first was like this, I swore he’d be in pullups till he was 16. If I tried to just take them away he looked at me and peed on the floor. Potty? My arse.
    The second? I said “OK we’re done with diapers”, and that was it. I kept waiting for the relapse but it never came! I still can’t believe it.

  • Posted by Andrea on Apr 06, 2010

    LOL! So been there, oh man.

  • Posted by Kruse on Apr 02, 2010


  • Posted by the lovely Husband on Apr 02, 2010

    On peer pressure coming back to haunt you:
    (Age 3, in response to keeping the breakable ceramic tea set out of reach): “Mommy, Maya play with teapot? Friends in preschool use teapot.”
    (Age 8, in response to discouraging overcaffeination): “But Mom, why can’t I have a cup of hot tea like you are? You said my preschool friends were using it all the way back when they were three.”
    (Age 16, in response to the unmistakable scent of combusted cash-crop in the bedroom despite a high-speed fan that’s she’s never used and a window that she’s never opened): “Don’t get all ‘patently shocked’ on me, Mom. Hey, you were the one who told me back when I was three that ‘all my friends use pot.’”
    At least you can pay her not to toke up. Much like paying farmers not to grow corn.

  • Posted by Heidi on Apr 02, 2010

    this is a classic for sure..
    love it!
    Bribe away mama…
    Bribery also works towards clean houses, just sayin’

  • Posted by Kruse on Apr 02, 2010

    okay, you’re smart, funny, a talented knitter and designer, you live in a lovely warm part of the world, you have great friends a lovely husband, a fantastic yarn stash…I say ‘Go Maya!,’ it helps me feel less bitter and twisted to know that you are challenged by the angel!!! :)

  • Posted by Big Alice on Apr 02, 2010

    Your handspun is beautiful!
    I once TAed for a professor who gave something like 2% (or 3%? I don’t remember) addition to the grade if the student had a perfect attendance in the class. He said he’d tried it both ways – taking away points if you missed classes vs. rewarding for good attendance, and he said the reward scheme worked vastly better than the punishment. So I just think you’re being pragmatic.

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